I look at my friend Sarah and see her spiritual gift for evangelism. I look at my friend Naomi and see how close her relationship is with the Lord and her power she has with her ears to listen. I see that Julia has a servants heart. I look at myself and don't see any of that. Why? Why aren't I like them? Why can't I lead people to the Lord within minutes like Sarah can? Why don't I have the power to listen like Naomi does? Do I serve for my own glory, or for the glory of God?
Shortly after I asked myslef all of these questions, God answered me. It's not that Sarah is spiritually better than me, or that Julia is completely selfless and I am totally selfish. It's not that I'm impatient and Naomi has all the patients in the world. It's that I am me. Naomi is Naomi, Sarah is Sarah, Julia is Julia. What all these girls have in common is that these strenghts I have identified are their gifts from God. Those are their strong points God has given them and they are all different. Just like God gave each of them different gifts, I have my own gift. I just have to WAIT. God will help me in time figure out why I am here, what my purpose is, and how to use my gift to the fullest to glorify Him. I would absolutly love to pray with someone on the street that I've never met before and help them to accept Christ. And maybe that's my gift. I don't know yet. Right now, that's not where God is calling me. And that's okay.
All I know is God will show me the way. He will show me what He has planned for my future. I may never be able to lead people to the Lord like Sarah. But I may be able to plant the seed, or even to water it. I don't know. But God does, and I love knowing that He is the one who holds my destiny and knows everything from beginning to end. Becuase believe you me, if I knew that, I would be completely terrified.
Don't worry if you haven't found your "calling" yet. I haven't either. I do know that I can't wait until God reveals it to me! And I can't wait until you let God take ahold of your life, if you haven't already, and show you what He has planned for you.
Much love,
Gabi
